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A New Yorker in the South:: Pregnant Meanings

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010/08/pregnant-meanings.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. In the South, a compliment is never a compliment. Okay, sometimes, it's an honest compliment. But often, it's cause for paranoia. I am 37 weeks pregnant, and have been showered with compliments lately. I am proud to say that I have strenuously resisted the temptation to question those good words with my own cynicism. In other words - I decided to take what I could get. Oh, you're so cute. Don't you look adorable! You are ALL baby!

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A New Yorker in the South:: January 2009

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2009_01_01_archive.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. Master Gardener or Master of Death. When I imagined my escape from New York, I envisioned the garden I was going to grow. A gigantic space of growing-ness. Candide Gone Wild; my own garden harvested in a mega way. Many rows of vegetables, dense patches of bright, dazzling flowers, and lavender. Lavender everywhere I looked. (Should have just gone to Provence.). I ignored the few minor obstacles:. Woman without a Country. A native New ...

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A New Yorker in the South:: June 2010

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010_06_01_archive.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. To See or not to See. My husband and I desperately needed clarity when deciding if we should move out of NYC. We made a thorough and lengthy Pros and Cons list only to find that the Pros column equaled the Cons. In the end, the issues weighed differently, and as you know, the South won. At least, on paper. One of the weighty Pros issues was: “Prolonged childhood for our kids.” Longer innocence. 8220;What’s so funny? 8221; I said.

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A New Yorker in the South:: August 2010

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010_08_01_archive.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. In the South, a compliment is never a compliment. Okay, sometimes, it's an honest compliment. But often, it's cause for paranoia. I am 37 weeks pregnant, and have been showered with compliments lately. I am proud to say that I have strenuously resisted the temptation to question those good words with my own cynicism. In other words - I decided to take what I could get. Oh, you're so cute. Don't you look adorable! You are ALL baby!

anewyorkerinthesouth.com

A New Yorker in the South:: things that drive you mad in suburbia. thing 1: Laziness

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010/08/my-shockingly-slothy-neighbor.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. Things that drive you mad in suburbia. thing 1: Laziness. Every morning, when driving the kids to school, we pass a Mercedes wagon parked and idling at the start of my neighbor's driveway, next to their mailbox. Until today, I assumed one of them was leaving for work at the same time we leave to drive the kids to school, but I'd heard that this couple worked at home, so it puzzled me. Every day. Drives from garage to mailbox. ...The l...

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A New Yorker in the South:: To See or not to See

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010/06/to-see-or-not-to-see-my-husband-and-i.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. To See or not to See. My husband and I desperately needed clarity when deciding if we should move out of NYC. We made a thorough and lengthy Pros and Cons list only to find that the Pros column equaled the Cons. In the end, the issues weighed differently, and as you know, the South won. At least, on paper. One of the weighty Pros issues was: “Prolonged childhood for our kids.” Longer innocence. 8220;What’s so funny? 8221; I said.

anewyorkerinthesouth.com

A New Yorker in the South:: North-South Jokes

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2009/02/north-south-jokes.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. Two jokes, sent from a Mobile, Alabama gal living in Brooklyn:. Where are you from? Southern girl and Northern girl sit next to each other on an airplane. SG: Where are you from? NG: I'm from a place where we know better than to end a sentence with a preposition. Southern girl sits quietly for a moment, finally turns back to Northern girl and asks: "Where are you from, Bitch? Southern girl says, "Bless your heart.”. In order to keep t...

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A New Yorker in the South:: February 2009

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2009_02_01_archive.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. Two jokes, sent from a Mobile, Alabama gal living in Brooklyn:. Where are you from? Southern girl and Northern girl sit next to each other on an airplane. SG: Where are you from? NG: I'm from a place where we know better than to end a sentence with a preposition. Southern girl sits quietly for a moment, finally turns back to Northern girl and asks: "Where are you from, Bitch? Southern girl says, "Bless your heart.”. Links to this post.

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A New Yorker in the South:: May 2010

http://www.anewyorkerinthesouth.com/2010_05_01_archive.html

A New Yorker in the South:. Notes from inside these dis-United States. My Southern friend on the phone:. Did you read the paper today? Embarrassed that I never read the local paper, I answered her quietly, “Uh, no.”. 8220;Well, A.H., that developer in town, is going to the pokie.”. My Southern friend giggled. He’s going where? 8220;The pokie,” she said. “You’ve never heard that term? 8220;Never,” I said. I’ve heard of Hokey Pokie. 8220;Jail,” she said. “He’s going to jail.”. West Indian word for pussy.