The World According to Albert Mills of Cane Shum (Keynsham, Gert Lush) - Proudly clogging up the arteries of the Internet with satirical nonsense since 2003
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The World According To Albert Mills of Cane Shum (Keynsham, Gert Lush) | albertmills.co.uk Reviews
https://albertmills.co.uk
The World According to Albert Mills of Cane Shum (Keynsham, Gert Lush) - Proudly clogging up the arteries of the Internet with satirical nonsense since 2003
albertmills.co.uk
Albert Mills of Cane Shum - Encyclopedia Mills
http://albertmills.co.uk/encyclopedia_mills.htm
RArr; Encyclopedia Mills. It's What Keynsham and The Universe Has Been Demanding. Alternative meanings with surreal leanings. Please use the menu below to navigate the Encyclopedia Mills. A Glossary Of Tossery. It's a wonderful thing to have and now you. Can have it too with this handy, cut-out-and-paste guide to Keynsham. Including its Motherland of Somerset. Plus the rest of the Universe. Each entry in the Encyclopedia Mills. Don't forget to call back soon - the Encyclopedia Mills. Comes equipped with ...
The World According To Albert Mills of Cane Shum (Keynsham, Gert Lush)
http://albertmills.co.uk/index.htm
Welcome To The World According To Albert Mills. Wwwalbertmills.co.uk → Website mood: jovial satire → Keynsham status: gert lush. Reetings fellow citizens of Keynsham. Albert Mills here, editor of Keynsham's 'other' site - Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. Welcome one-and-all to my ever-expanding website, including the Encyclopedia Mills. A complete guide to life in Keynsham. Click away my babbers. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I do writing it. Albert. x. A handy guide to everything. Who is number six?
Albert Mills of Cane Shum - The Tailrace
http://albertmills.co.uk/tailrace.htm
RArr; The Tailrace. See Also: And finally, parting food for thought, one for the road. Pronunciation: 'tal-,ras → Function: noun → Definition: The part of a millrace below the water wheel through which the spent water flows. Building A Bridge To Our Hearts. Echo Viaduct (click to enlarge). So, there I was, sat in the garden, enjoying the May sunshine and the smell of distant bonfires, when I had a thought. A silly, selfish, hopeless thought that wouldn't go away. What if Keynsham. Came into some cash?
Albert Mills of Cane Shum - About Albert
http://albertmills.co.uk/about_albert.htm
RArr; About Albert. Frequently Asked Questions - Answered by Albert Mills Esq, International man of misery. Albert Mills by Eli McChurch. I am Albert Joseph Arthur Mills Esq, born and bred in Keynsham, Somerset. I was Editor-in-Chief of the Keynsham-themed satirical website known to Earthlings as Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. What happened to the Cane Shum website? Why did it stop? Will Cane Shum ever be updated? Were you really going to seek election? No And yes. We did briefly discuss the idea of formin...
Albert Mills of Cane Shum - Encyclopedia Mills - K
http://albertmills.co.uk/encyclopedia_mills_k.htm
RArr; Encyclopedia Mills. Encyclopedia Mills - K. Alternative meanings with surreal leanings. Please use the menu below to navigate the Encyclopedia Mills. See also: truce, uneasy, battle of temple street, sinking → Estimated milage: 3. Keep Keynsham Local is a joint initiative spearheaded by Keynsham. S two fierce-rival councils, BANES. And Keynsham Town Council. See also: The Big K, Cane Shum, Keynsh, Keynsham Mean Time → UK Top Town Ranking: 1st (Gert Lush). At the mouth of the River Chew. In 2008, a ...
TOTAL PAGES IN THIS WEBSITE
13
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Image Archive - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/images.htm
Bull; IMAGE ARCHIVE. Bull; EMAIL US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. COULD 'DIS BE CANE SHUM - IMAGE ARCHIVE. TORY 'CREAM FOR SCHOOLS' SHOCK! Inspired by the plight of a ginger kid blistered by the playground sunshine, Charlton. Bottom decides to take on the Head of Bristol City Council in an e-fistfight. Bull; READ THE FULL STORY. The wait is over, the designs have been studied and the votes have been cast. And counted - the replacement for the long lost clock tower has been.
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Market Rumours Persist - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue2/iss2_art1.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. Cadbury's and North East Somerset? Still feeling the aftershocks from the decision to close the town's farmers market after less than a year in operation, amid unconfirmed reports that a thirteenth-hour rescue package may be on the horizon. Speaking to Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. However, rumours have begun to circulate that suggest local firm Cadbury's may be ready to step in to save the market. Th...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Reader Correspondence - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue1/letters.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. YOUR LETTERS TO CANE SHUM - OCTOBER 2003. LETTER OF THE MONTH. As close as we get. If there's one thing I can't stand it's them parking wardens, the ones what go around in twos. I seen 'em the other week - one of 'em is writing a ticket while the other is standing there grinning like a Cheshire cat. Who pays their wages? Peter Clapper, aged 41, Chandag Close. Ng in the park. If I had a pound for ...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Keynsham Webcam 1 - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue1/webcam.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. COULD 'DIS BE CANE SHUM - WEBCAM #1. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. Page The camera refreshes approximately every 6 seconds. During the night this page will run highlights of footage from the previous day, as our equipment is too poor to record in the dark. Sorry. Gets it's name from the old municipal tin bath that used to be housed in a small building where the mini-roundabout is now situated. Check out t...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Complete Archive - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/archive.htm
Bull; IMAGE ARCHIVE. Bull; EMAIL US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. COULD 'DIS BE CANE SHUM - SEASON ONE. Issue 1 - (Click image to view). Issue 1 - October 2003. The debut issue of Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. First published on October 1st 2003. Our exclusive stories include: Shock! Keynsham's infamous CLOCK TOWER. Is missing; The disturbing news that a TRAVELLER CAMP. Is planned for the town; An EU pilot scheme is set to bring WINTER DARKNESS. Is unfit for earthquake weather. A ple...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - The Molehills Are Mountains - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue2/iss2_art4.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. THE MOLEHILLS ARE MOUNTAINS. Get orf my laaaaand! Farmer has called for immediate government intervention following the mystery appearance of an over-sized mole on parts of his land situated on the southern outskirts of the sleepy Somerset town. Blind, cute and deadly. Keynsham has it's very own Backyard Wrestling Crew? What does the weather have in store for the Keynsham area in November? Bull; Mont...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Car Park To C.R.A.P Park - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue1/iss1_art3.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. CAR PARK TO C.R.A.P PARK. Farewell parking, hello crusties. Bath and North East Somerset Council press release has revealed that the 'Pay and Display' parking in Keynsham has been a huge success, generating enough revenue to continue with the next phase of the 'Car, Recreation and Amenities Plan'. Part two of the plan, which was discovered by Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Pay and Display ticket. See our...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Stop, Look And Listen - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue2/iss2_art3.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. STOP, LOOK AND LISTEN. Wayne, it's yer mum - yer tea's ready.'. Have noticed over the last few months an abundance of alarmingly fast, ridiculously noisy, "full body racing kit"; super-loud stereo system-equipped motor cars and cheesy hair-drier-like scooters zooming around our sleepy town. Albert Rd: Keep pets indoors. Tis bleedin' out of this world - make you deaf it will! From a land called 'Froom...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - Dodgy Balls In Blow Shock!! - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue2/iss2_art2.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. DODGY BALLS IN BLOW SHOCK! Keynsham: Lacking balls (Click to enlarge). Businessman has this week announced ambitious plans to launch Keynsham's very own lottery prize draw - KLOTTO! With lucky townsfolk set to bathe in the glamour and excitement that comes with life-changing riches. After an exhaustive search, Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. It won't be you. I've come over all queer, like.". If you can help...
Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum - End Of The World As We Know It - www.caneshum.co.uk
http://caneshum.co.uk/issue2/iss2_art5.htm
Bull; IN BRIEF. Bull; BACK ISSUES. Bull; ABOUT US. Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. A Different View Of Keynsham. END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT. Dead end. Well, who would've thought it, eh? Clairvoyant has voiced predictions of a gloomy future for Keynsham and it's residents, following the unearthing of ancient literature warning of imminent apocalypse in one of the town's lesser-known roads. The end is now (Click to enlarge). What does the weather have in store for the Keynsham area in November? Another exclus...
TOTAL LINKS TO THIS WEBSITE
20
Albert Mill Antique Centre
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The World According To Albert Mills of Cane Shum (Keynsham, Gert Lush)
Welcome To The World According To Albert Mills. Wwwalbertmills.co.uk → Website mood: jovial satire → Keynsham status: gert lush. Reetings fellow citizens of Keynsham. Albert Mills here, editor of Keynsham's 'other' site - Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum. Welcome one-and-all to my ever-expanding website, including the Encyclopedia Mills. A complete guide to life in Keynsham. Click away my babbers. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I do writing it. Albert. x. A handy guide to everything. Who is number six?
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